Tired

I didn't sleep again last night.

I have the shakes I'm so tired.

Last night, I stayed up later than usual for two main reasons.

• I was hoping exhaustion would allow me to sleep regardless of the pain.


• Barry sent me a big buttload of journal entries to format and upload, so I was doing that to make the page as current as possible. I finished it up around 11:30 last night.
  

The wreck is haunting me again. It seems that Safeway is wanting details of the accident that I'm afraid I cannot provide. I'm so scared I'm gonna be sued, even though I'm insured by Nationwide to the teeth. Don't know why I should be so frightened about it. You can't squeeze blood out of a turnip, or so the saying goes.

I came into work today to find that the phones are still out. The storm from yesterday fried out lines, it seems. This is great news in that no phones will allow for a wee bit of peace, at least for a little while. It's also bad news, 'cos the fax machine is down as well and, when the lines are repaired, there's going to be an account charge order avalanche. More 12 hour days are looming in the foreseeable future and I'm too tired to bother.

I can't work over today anyway since I have to go see Mary Jo at Nationwide about this form I have to fill out.

And I have Barry's words from 'MuargMuarg' ringing in my thoughts: "Seek to know no more, young Jedi, it's a fire fight in a shit storm." Why? I know not.

My Heart Aches

From his journal:
"It's a monday in Buffalo and the gig is almost empty. I play with an assurance I havent felt before doing the 'Haunted Box' set. For an hour I don't care how few punters there are. It's a brilliant thing to do. After, I feel crap: Marty the promoter doing the decent thing and paying even though we didnt meet the guarantee. I feel guilty and old and useless and wander off on my own to drink tequila in an Irish bar. The landlord is a rotund bearded Grateful Dead-Head who sucks on a huge cigar and keeps up a constant, stand-up comedian rant to his pissed acolytes around the bar (he himself does not drink). I think we discuss the War which fits my dark mood. Mr Cigar is Against It and assures me that many Americans are. At least I didnt stumble into a peacenik-lynching bar: that would have, as they say, put the tin hat on it."

I am trying once more to reach out to RCA regarding 'Haunted Box' and, this time, also 'Stic Basin'. Karen is on my side with just about everything. She said to send her the press kit and CD's, which I shall do forthwith. If crap acts like Jimmy Eat World can get signed, surely a rare talent with loads of experience has a chance somewhere??

Damnation.