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tinhuvielToday is my shaving day. Since I have a heavy dose of ethnic blood ~ mad Jewish women with too much testosterone, this shaving project takes a while. I think that some of my ancestors made it to America a very long time ago and started the Native American legend of Sasquatch.
Sasquatch was a woman, a Jewish woman from either Holland or Hungary (not quite clear on that one yet) who had not shaved in a couple of weeks. The Natives saw her roaming about the countryside, checking out the local flora and fauna, and they were in awe of this hairy creature invading their lands. Sasquatch was born!
So each Saturday I de-Sasquatch. I do so for my own protection and the preservation of the faint-hearted. The only thing I'm not shaving, plucking, or waxing is my eyebrows. Llew wants to see my brows in all their glory. He was gracious enough to concede about my keeping the middle part clear so I wouldn't be mistaken for Leonid Brezhnev.
Hair has been a bane to my existence for ever the longest. If I don't de-Sasquatch, I'm looked upon like a 'freak of nature' for my excessive hairiness; however, what most people don't know is that we ethnic types who have the hair issue also have an overload of testosterone. That makes most Manheim women, to the best of my knowledge, extremely sexual creatures. So, the next time you men spurn a hairy woman, just think about this: you're probably missing the chance for an ungodly experience in sexual heaven ~ a woman who's drive meets or probably exceeds your own. Besides, she probably hasn't had the chance to de-Sasquatch!
Anyway, I've got to get back to it. My day is being made easier by a new razor I bought: Gillette Venus Passion. It's sweeeet and I haven't cut myself once yet. Yay me!
Sasquatch was a woman, a Jewish woman from either Holland or Hungary (not quite clear on that one yet) who had not shaved in a couple of weeks. The Natives saw her roaming about the countryside, checking out the local flora and fauna, and they were in awe of this hairy creature invading their lands. Sasquatch was born!
So each Saturday I de-Sasquatch. I do so for my own protection and the preservation of the faint-hearted. The only thing I'm not shaving, plucking, or waxing is my eyebrows. Llew wants to see my brows in all their glory. He was gracious enough to concede about my keeping the middle part clear so I wouldn't be mistaken for Leonid Brezhnev.
Hair has been a bane to my existence for ever the longest. If I don't de-Sasquatch, I'm looked upon like a 'freak of nature' for my excessive hairiness; however, what most people don't know is that we ethnic types who have the hair issue also have an overload of testosterone. That makes most Manheim women, to the best of my knowledge, extremely sexual creatures. So, the next time you men spurn a hairy woman, just think about this: you're probably missing the chance for an ungodly experience in sexual heaven ~ a woman who's drive meets or probably exceeds your own. Besides, she probably hasn't had the chance to de-Sasquatch!
Anyway, I've got to get back to it. My day is being made easier by a new razor I bought: Gillette Venus Passion. It's sweeeet and I haven't cut myself once yet. Yay me!
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hairy Jews
Date: 2003-05-10 10:50 am (UTC)enjoy, Angelina baby!!
Hmnnn...
Date: 2003-05-10 12:25 pm (UTC)TQM
Part Time Morale Officer for the Sasquatch Light Infantry
Olympic Peninsula Division