Aunt Tudi and I ventured out into the great big world to go to the bank for Aunt Tudi to get some things straightened out, hit the pharm for that good shit called insulin, and get a bag of ice for Aunt Tudi's ice water and for when Diane and Bobby come back to do more yard work. Everything was going along smoothly until we got to the BP up the road from our house. Aunt Tudi went in to pay for the ice and I opened the ice container to pull out a bag. Here's where it got interesting. The bags of ice were stuck, so I had to yank a tad to get one loose. When I did, I stepped off the curb with my left foot and straight into a hole that reached at least the first ring of Hell and was filled with water. My ankle popped one way, then the other, and down I went, straight into the hole. I couldn't help it. I screamed out. Fortunately, the manager of the truck stop behind the BP, helped pick me up out of the hole and to the curb. I sat their crying my eyes out while Aunt Tudi went in and raised a massive patch of hell whilst reporting the injury. The truck stop manager and a couple of his guys hung around until Aunt Tudi was finished then, when I was ready to try it, they helped me to the car. I drove home and Aunt Tudi went into the house and called Janice, who took me to the E/R.
When I got there, they recognised me from when I was in there with Aunt Tudi not quite a week ago. They rushed me through, because I could not stop crying. This is not like me. I just...don't...cry. Especially in public. So, when they asked me what my pain level was from a 1 to a 10, I told them 10 because I don't cry in front of people and I couldn't help myself doing what I was doing. The doctor came in (and he was a delicious Italian man I wanted to take home), and he noted how huge my foot and ankle were, especially compared to my other ankle. He said I would definitely need a splint and some pain medicine, and that I would have to see an orthopaedic doctor. But he wanted to get x-rays just to make certain nothing was broken. Nothing was. So Corinne, who had been the one to help Aunt Tudi so much in the E/R, came in and placed the splint on my leg.
Afterward, the doc came back in with my discharge instructions and my prescription for Lortab 10s. He said he was giving me the strongest and that I should take 1 or 2 every 4 to 6 hours. That's pretty much unprecedented, especially since he gave me 20 of them. He said that my pain was going to be pretty damned bad. No fucking shit, dude. Come home with me and I will molest you, pain or no pain. But I digress.
When Janice got me home, she helped me to the front porch. We got to the steps and she said, "Okay, here comes the fun part." Then she promptly stepped on my bad foot. It hurt like hell, but I had to laugh like a hyaena. It was just so apropos, you know? She apologised and apologised, and I told her it was okay and that I was okay, but she had better believe that funny moment in a not-so-funny experience was going to end up in my journal. She just heaved a sigh, 'cos I knows I put everything here.
So... on to the pictures! All these are being saved on my memory card, Photobucket, and the hard drive since BP is going to have to be held accountable for this sorry situation. I need to post the pics fast, 'cos I've taken my pain meds and I think I'll be floating here shortly. Yay me.
( a pictorial account of Tin vs. the BP Puddle to Hell ) I'm supposed to call the orthopaedist tomorrow, which I'll do. And I have to cancel the dogs' grooming appointment and my eye exam appointment for tomorrow, considering that I'm a cripple with no way to get around. Janice will have to take me see Dr. Grady for whenever he has the time to see me, which I hope is soon so I get get out of this splint. It's killing me already.
And now I am drunk.
